Since I moved here to west podunk a few years ago I have found myself hanging around with unbelievers a good bit more, especially people I work with. I don't hide my faith, but I don't shove it down anyone's throat either. What I tend to share most are my own personal experiences with faith. At first it was obvious that some people censored what they talked about around me but gradually over time, some of that has changed. I have found it interesting to hear what nonbelievers say about Christians when they forget there is one in the room.
Last night it was "girls night out", which amounted to lots talking and take out eaten pool side at the home of one of the "girls". During "girl's night out" one of the women I do not work with started talking about how two of the women she works with have recently "found Jesus" and how annoying these ladies are. One of the other women said "Oh, there's nothing worse than being stuck working with someone who just found Jesus!"
One day last week I was eating lunch with some coworkers and one of them was talking about being 12 years old and getting harassed every afternoon on her paper route by kids "from the Baptist church". These kids would corner her on the street, tell her she was going to hell, and shove some gospel tracts at her. She said she felt like a "project".
At one point in time I would have said these sorts of stories were just examples of 1 Corinthians 2:14, "The man without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God, for they are foolishness to him, and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually discerned." But, after I have had more opportunities to be privy to these kinds of conversations I think that instead of attributing these sorts of statements to an inability to discern spiritual truth and dismissing them, we need to be more open to how we are being perceived by unbelievers.
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Hello
I haven't written much here lately. I think that some things I have experienced in the last few months and my feelings about what happened have colored my perceptions to the point that I have thought it was better for me to keep my thoughts mostly to myself for a while.
I don't want to go into too much detail here but I had a brief relationship with a man that was not good. Before things got bad we talked a good bit about issues between men and women in society and in the church. So, when I have read stuff online over the past few months about issues between men and women that are the same or similar to things that he and I discussed, I find myself reacting emotionally (hurt, anger) about it because I am associating things with him. The emotion isn't about the issue, but rather about what happened between this man and I. So, I haven't felt that what I would have to say in this blog or in the comments in others' blogs would be productive. The emotional reaction seems to be getting better but I now find myself working through my thoughts and beliefs about these sorts of issues from a somewhat different perspective.
On the positive side, the experience has served to draw my attention to an issue that has been affecting my walk with God for a long time. It has been in the back of my mind though I have been unable to put it into words and recognize it for what it is until just recently. I am not prepared to write about the issue here at the moment because it is just too personal and raw for me. But, I am happy to say that I definitely sense God pursuing me and urging me to deal with this issue and so that feels very hopeful to me.
I don't want to go into too much detail here but I had a brief relationship with a man that was not good. Before things got bad we talked a good bit about issues between men and women in society and in the church. So, when I have read stuff online over the past few months about issues between men and women that are the same or similar to things that he and I discussed, I find myself reacting emotionally (hurt, anger) about it because I am associating things with him. The emotion isn't about the issue, but rather about what happened between this man and I. So, I haven't felt that what I would have to say in this blog or in the comments in others' blogs would be productive. The emotional reaction seems to be getting better but I now find myself working through my thoughts and beliefs about these sorts of issues from a somewhat different perspective.
On the positive side, the experience has served to draw my attention to an issue that has been affecting my walk with God for a long time. It has been in the back of my mind though I have been unable to put it into words and recognize it for what it is until just recently. I am not prepared to write about the issue here at the moment because it is just too personal and raw for me. But, I am happy to say that I definitely sense God pursuing me and urging me to deal with this issue and so that feels very hopeful to me.
Saturday, March 22, 2008
Just an observation...
I have an awful cold for the fourth time in about six months. When I woke up this morning I thought that I had at least picked a good Saturday to be sick at home since there would be lots of college hoops to watch. Unfortunately I have discovered that cold medicine and the excitement of the NCAA tournament (especially since my two favorite teams are still in it) do not mix well. Yikes, the palpitations!
Monday, March 3, 2008
Where Next?
Found a link to this site over at The View From Her. You can make a map of all the places in the world you have visited:
create your own visited country map
Along with other cool maps.
My conclusion? I need to travel more :)
create your own visited country map
Along with other cool maps.
My conclusion? I need to travel more :)
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Still Here
I haven't written anything of any real substance here for awhile because I have been in a very introspective frame of mind. I have been processing things through the lenses (and they are not rose colored) of some of my own recent experiences so I think anything I would have written would have been too influenced by that. I haven’t posted here or even commented in other’s blog’s much at all because of that. In some cases I have stopped reading some blogs because the subject matter of issues between men and women are related to some of the issues I have recently been dealing with.
I have been learning (or re-learning…sigh) some lessons that have been good, though difficult for me to learn.
Lesson 1: Don’t let your “tanks” get too empty.
The stress and time commitment of working on my dissertation while continuing to work full time left me with empty or nearly empty physical, emotional, and spiritual tanks. I have been so focused on the task before me (thinking that it is only for a limited time and I can just push through it) that I have not been taking care of myself. I have not been getting enough sleep, or exercise, or eating well. I have not been spending enough time with friends or family or engaging in activities that are renewing for me. I have not been spending enough time focusing on my spiritual health. I adopted a sort of “siege mentality” toward finishing my doctorate that has made it tough for me to surrender to God. Bad idea. This is a bad idea because among other things, it left me vulnerable to getting sick more often and vulnerable to being taken advantage of. I have learned the hard way that I am going to have to slow down and ease up in order to take better care of myself and focus on the important things, not just the “urgent” things.
Lesson 2: Some people should not be given another chance.
I always try to see the best in people and tend to give them more chances than is probably wise. I think this stems from my optimistic nature and from the fact that I am very aware of God’s grace and mercy toward me and feel that I should extend that grace and mercy toward others. I don’t think it is a bad thing to be optimistic or to extend grace to others but when not tempered by wisdom and combined with the afore mentioned “empty tanks” those qualities can allow people to take advantage of me. I think things like “If he really understood that he was hurting me, surely he wouldn’t do that”. But, the truth is that there are some people in the world who will choose to do things even though they know they are hurting someone else. In fact, some people will purposefully choose to hurt other people. Even people who identify themselves as Christians.
I am sure that more lessons will be forthcoming and I think that is good. It is time I take my life out of it’s dissertation holding pattern and really be present in it for today. The dissertation will still get done. (Right?)
I have been learning (or re-learning…sigh) some lessons that have been good, though difficult for me to learn.
Lesson 1: Don’t let your “tanks” get too empty.
The stress and time commitment of working on my dissertation while continuing to work full time left me with empty or nearly empty physical, emotional, and spiritual tanks. I have been so focused on the task before me (thinking that it is only for a limited time and I can just push through it) that I have not been taking care of myself. I have not been getting enough sleep, or exercise, or eating well. I have not been spending enough time with friends or family or engaging in activities that are renewing for me. I have not been spending enough time focusing on my spiritual health. I adopted a sort of “siege mentality” toward finishing my doctorate that has made it tough for me to surrender to God. Bad idea. This is a bad idea because among other things, it left me vulnerable to getting sick more often and vulnerable to being taken advantage of. I have learned the hard way that I am going to have to slow down and ease up in order to take better care of myself and focus on the important things, not just the “urgent” things.
Lesson 2: Some people should not be given another chance.
I always try to see the best in people and tend to give them more chances than is probably wise. I think this stems from my optimistic nature and from the fact that I am very aware of God’s grace and mercy toward me and feel that I should extend that grace and mercy toward others. I don’t think it is a bad thing to be optimistic or to extend grace to others but when not tempered by wisdom and combined with the afore mentioned “empty tanks” those qualities can allow people to take advantage of me. I think things like “If he really understood that he was hurting me, surely he wouldn’t do that”. But, the truth is that there are some people in the world who will choose to do things even though they know they are hurting someone else. In fact, some people will purposefully choose to hurt other people. Even people who identify themselves as Christians.
I am sure that more lessons will be forthcoming and I think that is good. It is time I take my life out of it’s dissertation holding pattern and really be present in it for today. The dissertation will still get done. (Right?)
Sunday, February 3, 2008
Super Bowl Musings
My thoughts from the Super Bowl:
1. Joe Buck....you get on my last nerve.
2. I have never been a Giants fan...until today.
3. MVP Eli Manning you are my new favorite person because you saved me from a year of hearing how perfect and great the New England Patriots are.
4. Jay Alford, that was a lovely sack. In fact the whole Giant's defense was amazing.
5. Can you believe Belechick left the field before the game was over? He must be hanging around with Randy Moss too much.
My favorite commercial was the one for Pepsi (was it Pepsi Max?) with all the head bobbing ala the Butabi Brothers of SNL and "A Night at the Roxbury" with an appearance from Chris Kattan. What was your favorite?
1. Joe Buck....you get on my last nerve.
2. I have never been a Giants fan...until today.
3. MVP Eli Manning you are my new favorite person because you saved me from a year of hearing how perfect and great the New England Patriots are.
4. Jay Alford, that was a lovely sack. In fact the whole Giant's defense was amazing.
5. Can you believe Belechick left the field before the game was over? He must be hanging around with Randy Moss too much.
My favorite commercial was the one for Pepsi (was it Pepsi Max?) with all the head bobbing ala the Butabi Brothers of SNL and "A Night at the Roxbury" with an appearance from Chris Kattan. What was your favorite?
It's Fixed
In the public interest I feel that I must share this.... Groundhog Day is fixed. I have visited Goblers Knob, the scene of the crime gentle readers. I have visited Phil in his home at the Punxutawney Library. I have had the opportunity to closely examine the stump from which Punxutawney Phil emerges to predict the arrival of spring. I am sorry to report that the stump is backlit people....Of course Phil is going to see his shadow!
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